Yesterday I felt like I swallowed a grapefruit. Thus, after helping Kev move stuff around inside the new apartment for a while, I was assigned the heavy-duty job of keeping an eye on the unlocked storage unit. This made me look uber-cool to all Kevin and Christy's friends who kept walking past with large pieces of furniture and heavy boxes. I just stood there and smiled. Oh, and one time I abandoned my post to carry one of those cool exercise balls up the stairs. Then I was rewarded for all my sweating with some sparkling water and cold pizza. (Seriously, who is this girl and what did she do?) Oh yes, and then I bought some music on Kevin's itunes. I am SO helpful.
After a nap (I mean, I had only slept till noon and then worked HARD for three hours) I returned to the apartment eager to redeem myself with my witty personality (which Kevin claims I have). Hah! Instead I was teased mercilessly for hours on end. Let us make it clear that hot lemonade is delicious, is not referred to as SARS-ade, and that I never actually said I would buy everyone candy if I heard "Tesla" one more time! And really, the caesar dressing was too strong. I wanted that salad. Honestly. I should know better than to bring up chickens at the dinner table, but as I have not learned after 26 years, I was forced to walk away and wait outside.
We watched Clue ("Flames! Flames on the side of my face!") and ate truffles and Kevin poured me too much wine as usual.
I laughed. I laughed so much! There were entirely too many inside jokes for one night, and I had a great time.
I still feel like I swallowed a grapefruit.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Tesla
Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla Tesla
Yup, that about covers my night.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Tell me how you really feel
You know what? I'm kind of unhappy. I mean, I feel basically happy. That is, I can feel background, base, fundamental happiness. But I'm annoyed and unsatisfied. And I'd like to express that. I am annoyed at all the people I come across that think they know everything and are so arrogant about it. I'm annoyed that I'm sure I do the same thing sometimes. It disappoints and scares me to know that I can come across that way-- that part of me IS that way.
I'm annoyed that I look the way I do and annoyed that it takes serious sacrifices to change it. I do not feel like going to the gym. I can give up my croissant, but maybe not my hot chocolate. I can add water, but what will I eat for lunch? Look, I know what's good for me, but I'd honestly rather just not eat than eat something I don't really want. Yep, I'm that lazy. And I hate it. I know, I know. "Well, you don't hate it enough." "No one can change it but you." "You just have to do it." Enough already! I'm not stupid!
I can go through my day being perfectly cheerful. If you ask me how I am, I can give you the answer you want. I can tell you how I like the fall and how I enjoyed my visit with my nephews and how I'm looking forward to Christmas and how I thrive on reorganizing books even as I grumble to myself as I do it. I know these are the things I should be thinking about. Count your blessings, think happy thoughts. Positive thinking will change your day, blah blah blah. Look, I know there is truth to it but doesn't it sound so TV-Psycho-Pseudo-religious-self-help-babbley? I can't stand it!
I AM cheerful about those things. I am genuinely happy about them. I am also genuinely upset about other things and I don't like to take away from them. I am an equal-opportunity emotionalist.
In the spirit of that mostly-true but still annoying TV-Psycho-Pseudo-religious-self-help-babble I am not going to list more of the things I am upset about (being single) especially since some of them are things I could maybe do something about (my knees are really really scarily bad these days) . Instead I will list just a couple things that I'm happy about. My family, my good friends, sleep, stars, animals, people who are not mean, Jesus, the smell of wood.
There.
But just FYI, people should stop getting engaged and being beautiful and nice and smart and other annoying things like that. Go ahead, give me the "But Katie, you're beautiful and nice and smart and everything is in God's timing" lecture. Tell me something I haven't heard. I will believe you that I have the potential to be prettier than I am now and also that I'm not the least pretty person ever. That I am mostly nice but can also be pretty snarky. That I am not stupid (as I myself claimed above) but certainly have not done what I am capable of and am not capable of what others are (but you're a unique individual capable of different things! blah blah blah). And that yes, everything happens in God's timing. Darn God's timing.
Now just so you all know, I don't really feel that way. I mean, yes, I certainly do. But I fully recognize the fallibility, stubbornness, even sin in it all. Also the immaturity and the part that will lead you to say "You have to get yourself figured out before you can be in a relationship." (Another one I've heard more than once.)
Well, okay, that was just some human venting for the night.
I am going to bed.
Another disclaimer on grammar: When in a rant, one does not need to adhere to all grammar rules. That is, I don't need to. Ranting tends to produce difficult grammatical situations which require some thought and possibly research. There is no time to pause for this in the middle of said rant.
I'm annoyed that I look the way I do and annoyed that it takes serious sacrifices to change it. I do not feel like going to the gym. I can give up my croissant, but maybe not my hot chocolate. I can add water, but what will I eat for lunch? Look, I know what's good for me, but I'd honestly rather just not eat than eat something I don't really want. Yep, I'm that lazy. And I hate it. I know, I know. "Well, you don't hate it enough." "No one can change it but you." "You just have to do it." Enough already! I'm not stupid!
I can go through my day being perfectly cheerful. If you ask me how I am, I can give you the answer you want. I can tell you how I like the fall and how I enjoyed my visit with my nephews and how I'm looking forward to Christmas and how I thrive on reorganizing books even as I grumble to myself as I do it. I know these are the things I should be thinking about. Count your blessings, think happy thoughts. Positive thinking will change your day, blah blah blah. Look, I know there is truth to it but doesn't it sound so TV-Psycho-Pseudo-religious-self-help-babbley? I can't stand it!
I AM cheerful about those things. I am genuinely happy about them. I am also genuinely upset about other things and I don't like to take away from them. I am an equal-opportunity emotionalist.
In the spirit of that mostly-true but still annoying TV-Psycho-Pseudo-religious-self-help-babble I am not going to list more of the things I am upset about (being single) especially since some of them are things I could maybe do something about (my knees are really really scarily bad these days) . Instead I will list just a couple things that I'm happy about. My family, my good friends, sleep, stars, animals, people who are not mean, Jesus, the smell of wood.
There.
But just FYI, people should stop getting engaged and being beautiful and nice and smart and other annoying things like that. Go ahead, give me the "But Katie, you're beautiful and nice and smart and everything is in God's timing" lecture. Tell me something I haven't heard. I will believe you that I have the potential to be prettier than I am now and also that I'm not the least pretty person ever. That I am mostly nice but can also be pretty snarky. That I am not stupid (as I myself claimed above) but certainly have not done what I am capable of and am not capable of what others are (but you're a unique individual capable of different things! blah blah blah). And that yes, everything happens in God's timing. Darn God's timing.
Now just so you all know, I don't really feel that way. I mean, yes, I certainly do. But I fully recognize the fallibility, stubbornness, even sin in it all. Also the immaturity and the part that will lead you to say "You have to get yourself figured out before you can be in a relationship." (Another one I've heard more than once.)
Well, okay, that was just some human venting for the night.
I am going to bed.
Another disclaimer on grammar: When in a rant, one does not need to adhere to all grammar rules. That is, I don't need to. Ranting tends to produce difficult grammatical situations which require some thought and possibly research. There is no time to pause for this in the middle of said rant.
Meh
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081117/ap_on_re_eu/eu_britain_new_word;_ylt=Ap43YKmtewvrQ8sya0SKGpGs0NUE
That's right. They've added "Meh" to the dictionary. The problem? The definition is all wrong! Well, I guess that according to their source, the definition is correct. And I don't know when I started using the word and if it actually derived from The Simpsons because I don't watch that show. But I use it in frustration. I want to go home: Meh. Why can't I find that?!: Meh. There's too much going on: Meh. Apparently, it's supposed to more of an apathetic expression.
The only good I can see of this is, as pointed out by my sister, "meh" is now a legitimate Boggle word. Oh! Scrabble too.
But now that there is a dictionary definition for it, I can be accused of improper use. Do you want to know how I feel about that? Meh. (My way, not theirs.)
I would also just like to note that when I ran spell check on this post, every "meh" came up as a problem. We are not yet caught up.
That's right. They've added "Meh" to the dictionary. The problem? The definition is all wrong! Well, I guess that according to their source, the definition is correct. And I don't know when I started using the word and if it actually derived from The Simpsons because I don't watch that show. But I use it in frustration. I want to go home: Meh. Why can't I find that?!: Meh. There's too much going on: Meh. Apparently, it's supposed to more of an apathetic expression.
The only good I can see of this is, as pointed out by my sister, "meh" is now a legitimate Boggle word. Oh! Scrabble too.
But now that there is a dictionary definition for it, I can be accused of improper use. Do you want to know how I feel about that? Meh. (My way, not theirs.)
I would also just like to note that when I ran spell check on this post, every "meh" came up as a problem. We are not yet caught up.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Oh the Places...
On my drive home tonight I saw some signs that intrigued me. And perhaps, if I had time and it wasn't dark and I was a little more adventurous and I had batteries for my camera... If, If, If... I would have explored what lay down these roads...
1) Secret Town Road
Really? I mean, sure enough, you're driving through the mountains and there is suddenly an exit for Secret Town Road. Aren't you dying to know what's back there? Is it a small Bavarian-like village? Is it like Rivendell? Is it a casino and a McDonald's? Is it a trap?
2)Leisure Town Road
Again, I'm thinking trap here. Somehow first "Phantom Toll Booth" came to mind and then "Pilgrim's Progress." Yet, I want to see if it's massage and mocha like or front porch and coca-cola like. Probably neither. Things like this have lost their original intention.
3) Milk Farm Road.
First of all, why Milk Farm and not Dairy Farm? Also, is there really still any kind of farm down this road? Or has it also lost its original intention and perhaps the closest thing to a dairy product you can get is a McDonald's soft-serve or a frappuccino from Starbucks?
One more note. Vacaville. Right. Cowtown. Both on the way to Reno and the way back, I had to say it out loud. Vacaville. Look, I know that if you have lived in this area it's nothing new to you. I had even heard of it. But doesn't it strike you as a little ridiculous? It's a town named Cowtown? I'm sure it even was a cowtown once. It just makes me laugh. Also, I would like to find the nearest vaca. I'm not sure the denizens of Vacaville have seen one lately.
1) Secret Town Road
Really? I mean, sure enough, you're driving through the mountains and there is suddenly an exit for Secret Town Road. Aren't you dying to know what's back there? Is it a small Bavarian-like village? Is it like Rivendell? Is it a casino and a McDonald's? Is it a trap?
2)Leisure Town Road
Again, I'm thinking trap here. Somehow first "Phantom Toll Booth" came to mind and then "Pilgrim's Progress." Yet, I want to see if it's massage and mocha like or front porch and coca-cola like. Probably neither. Things like this have lost their original intention.
3) Milk Farm Road.
First of all, why Milk Farm and not Dairy Farm? Also, is there really still any kind of farm down this road? Or has it also lost its original intention and perhaps the closest thing to a dairy product you can get is a McDonald's soft-serve or a frappuccino from Starbucks?
One more note. Vacaville. Right. Cowtown. Both on the way to Reno and the way back, I had to say it out loud. Vacaville. Look, I know that if you have lived in this area it's nothing new to you. I had even heard of it. But doesn't it strike you as a little ridiculous? It's a town named Cowtown? I'm sure it even was a cowtown once. It just makes me laugh. Also, I would like to find the nearest vaca. I'm not sure the denizens of Vacaville have seen one lately.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Don't Look At Me!
My four-year-old nephew has been saying all weekend, "Don't look at me!" whenever he wants to do something he knows he shouldn't be doing or wants to do something himself when he could really use some help. I seem to remember one of his brothers going through this stage as well. Caleb was in a frazzled state tonight and he shuddered with tears as he tried to hold together his little image of self-sufficience.
In contrast, the rest of the time the kids are vying constantly for my attention-- Look at me! Watch this! Look what I did!
I think I have to say, before I get into this, that these little life lessons usually grate on me. But as it occurred to me all of its own (or of God's own?) I shall have to write it down. You know, just in case it is useful.
Isn't this how we are with God? And with the world as well. But more importantly with God. Don't look at me! we cry. I'm just going to go over here and do this and just don't look. And don't watch while I make a mess of this over here trying to deal by myself. I know you are offering your help, but I'm pretty sure I can do it. Just go away, and I'll let you know when you can look again.
Calories don't count when no one else is there to see you eat them. Falling down the stairs doesn't count if no one was there to laugh. If no one knows that someone hurt you, they didn't really hurt you. And if no one sees your own sin, maybe you can get away with it. But God is there, isn't he? God is looking. The good news is... drum roll please... Not in a God is Watching You creepy condemning kind of way! Yay! Yes, it is so true that God is a just and fair God who hates sin and does not take kindly to his people turning away from Him. It is also true that He is a loving, grace-filled and compassionate God.
What about the other part? Look at me! Look what I can do! We do that too. This is where the analogy starts grating on me more because I feel like I'm reaching, but I'll go for it. See, I don't know about kids' motives and I don't want to compare them to any of my own ridiculous cries for attention. What are my moments of "Look at me?" I feel like it's anytime I try to look nice, mention an accomplishment, or some such thing as that. But that is for the world. For God, I suppose it is when I say, "Well, look at that! I read the Bible tonight!" or "See how well I treated that person, God?" God sees right through me. He sees my real beauty, my real accomplishments, and my very heart-- and he loves me anyway.
I think perhaps my whole analogy fell apart there at the end, but maybe this was all to be a thinking exercise for me anyway. May God use it in my heart and in yours to His glory.
In contrast, the rest of the time the kids are vying constantly for my attention-- Look at me! Watch this! Look what I did!
I think I have to say, before I get into this, that these little life lessons usually grate on me. But as it occurred to me all of its own (or of God's own?) I shall have to write it down. You know, just in case it is useful.
Isn't this how we are with God? And with the world as well. But more importantly with God. Don't look at me! we cry. I'm just going to go over here and do this and just don't look. And don't watch while I make a mess of this over here trying to deal by myself. I know you are offering your help, but I'm pretty sure I can do it. Just go away, and I'll let you know when you can look again.
Calories don't count when no one else is there to see you eat them. Falling down the stairs doesn't count if no one was there to laugh. If no one knows that someone hurt you, they didn't really hurt you. And if no one sees your own sin, maybe you can get away with it. But God is there, isn't he? God is looking. The good news is... drum roll please... Not in a God is Watching You creepy condemning kind of way! Yay! Yes, it is so true that God is a just and fair God who hates sin and does not take kindly to his people turning away from Him. It is also true that He is a loving, grace-filled and compassionate God.
What about the other part? Look at me! Look what I can do! We do that too. This is where the analogy starts grating on me more because I feel like I'm reaching, but I'll go for it. See, I don't know about kids' motives and I don't want to compare them to any of my own ridiculous cries for attention. What are my moments of "Look at me?" I feel like it's anytime I try to look nice, mention an accomplishment, or some such thing as that. But that is for the world. For God, I suppose it is when I say, "Well, look at that! I read the Bible tonight!" or "See how well I treated that person, God?" God sees right through me. He sees my real beauty, my real accomplishments, and my very heart-- and he loves me anyway.
I think perhaps my whole analogy fell apart there at the end, but maybe this was all to be a thinking exercise for me anyway. May God use it in my heart and in yours to His glory.
Happiness is...
eating your favorite homemade dinner rolls.
snuggling with your new baby nephew.
going on a date to the bookstore with a four-year-old.
November actually feeling like November. Brrr!
buying a new sweater on sale.
˙pɹɐʍʞɔɐq puɐ uʍop ǝpısdn ƃuıdʎʇ
knowing that your nephews are smarter than you.
snow on the mountains.
hugs and kisses from sweet little boys.
sleeping in.
soccer, jets, sharks, books, piano, Tagalog, and drawing.
snuggling with your new baby nephew.
going on a date to the bookstore with a four-year-old.
November actually feeling like November. Brrr!
buying a new sweater on sale.
˙pɹɐʍʞɔɐq puɐ uʍop ǝpısdn ƃuıdʎʇ
knowing that your nephews are smarter than you.
snow on the mountains.
hugs and kisses from sweet little boys.
sleeping in.
soccer, jets, sharks, books, piano, Tagalog, and drawing.
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